Creationism: A Common Story Among Tubes

CREATIONISM

Creationists claim that everything was created by a human shaped Supreme Tube during a hyperactive, six day period. And then he had to rest on the seventh day. Wow, was he ever ADHD! And since then, no one has ever been able to contact him. This whole scenario is pretty hard to swallow (even for tubes) because if everything was created all at once (or in six days), then human shaped tubes and dinosaur shaped tubes would have had to hang out together and there’s no evidence that happened. The creationists base all their conclusions and theories on a book called the Bible that was written by a variety of human shaped tubes with some pretty weird ideas, but we look at Common Cult Tubal Beliefs or CCTB in the next section. Remember, in the basic tenants of Tubism we learned that humans were highly evolved (maybe not a good thing), complex tubes that make up elaborate stories about being more than tubes.

In this presentation of Tubism, I make no claims about how any of this got started. I find it unlikely that any tube even has the capability of discovering that, nor does it seem to make much difference except that those tubes who think they know tend to be pushy, arrogant and incredibly annoying, be they theists, atheists, anti-theists. They keep yelling at the tubes that disagree with them, threatening them with imaginary disasters and fates or promising some rather boring and distasteful rewards if they adopt the same ideas. They come on Saturdays a lot and keep ringing my doorbell even when I pretend I am not home. Was/is there a Supreme Tube from whom all other tubes have sprung or has the immense variety of tubes evolved over millions of years by accident or natural selection, or some combination of both? Evolution is now well proven. As for a Supreme Tube? Well.